i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
You pole danced in your parka.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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