What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
