I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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