It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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