My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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