It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
