i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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