i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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