Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize