My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize