Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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