Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
no more duck duck goose at the bar
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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