I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
