Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
