Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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