Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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