I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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