Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize