So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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