I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
