Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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