i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I will pee on everything he values.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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