when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
