There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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