Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
