ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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