I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
