She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Randomize
