rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
zippers are such a cool invention
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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