So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
