paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Randomize
