We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Maybe he injected his testicle?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
