Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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