hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
