You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
