He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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