Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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