i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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