I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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