I must be too annoying 4 u.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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