it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Randomize
