I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
