problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
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