you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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