Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
he shaved USA in his pubs
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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