You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize