dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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