The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
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