If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize