There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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