Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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